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Story of the day: Influencer περιγράφει πως η 3 ετών κορούλα της πέθανε απο καρκίνο στον εγκέφαλο σε 3 εβδομάδες (φωτό- βίντεο)

«Δεν ξέρω πως να το κάνω αυτό, ούτε πως θα επιβιώσω...» εξομολογείται η ίδια.

1 Ιουνίου 2020 - 1:13 μμ

Συγκλονίζει η ιστορία της Ashley Stock, η οποία έχασε το μόλις 3 ετών κοριτσάκι της από καρκίνο στον εγκέφαλο.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

?Stevie Lynn Stock ? 3 years old. Seed Planter. Miracle Maker. Light Giver. Heart Healer. Blue eyed, dimpled smile, curly haired forever baby girl. Adored little sister, daughter and friend. At 1:05pm on May 27th, Stevie took her final breath in our arms. There have been many miracles and countless God moments that I’ll put into words when my heart has strength. For now, I’m overwhelmed with relief that she’s at peace but I’m also feeling crushed by a pain so intense i can’t put it into words. I let it out a bit at a time, like when you gently twist the lid off a liter soda bottle...releasing the built up pressure a little at a time to keep it from exploding all over the place. I guess it’s like that. I’m twisting the lid on my grief gently. Because if i release it all at once, i don’t see how i could possibly survive. Gentleness has been my most effective approach on grief these last months, gentleness for myself and for all the beloved mourners by my side. We have complete faith in there being a greater purpose of this tragedy (and it’s already unfolding through your stories of renewed hope), but unfortunately, faith is not a “get out of pain free” card, and that’s okay. I don’t know how to do this, so for now we’ll continue one day at a time held by the grace of God, the support of loved ones and the prayers of strangers who have become friends. #stevielynnstock #dipg #starsforstevie

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

 

Η 35χρονη influencer μοιράστηκε τα τραγικά νέα με τους followers της στο instagram την περασμένη Παρασκευή, με μία σπαρακτική ανάρτηση. 

«Stevie Lynn Stock, 3 ετών... Στις 27 Μαΐου, στη μία το μεσημέρι, η Stevie πήρε την τελευταία της ανάσα στην αγκαλιά μας... Υπήρξαν πολλά θαύματα και αμέτρητες θεϊκές στιγμές για τις οποίες θα μιλήσω όταν θα έχω τη δύναμη... Προς το παρόν, νιώθω ανακούφιση για το γεγονός ότι ξεκουράστηκε, αλλά ταυτόχρονα νιώθω συντετριμμένη από έναν πόνο τόσο έντονο, που δεν μπορώ να εκφράσω με λόγια...» έγραψε, μεταξύ άλλων, για το κοριτσάκι της η Ashley Stock.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

 

Η μικρούλα Stevie διαγνώστηκε με έναν σπάνιο όγκο στον εγκέφαλο πριν από περίπου έναν μήνα, με την μαμά της να το ανακοινώνει συντετριμμένη και κλαμένη στους followers της, από την ογκολογική πτέρυγα του Νοσοκομείου Παίδων του Los Angeles.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

My unbreaking. I’m working every single second to keep my thoughts present, in this moment, rather than spiral into the fear of the “future possibilities” and “what if’s”. But sometimes i break, the flood gates open and i give myself permission to sit alone and cry while Stevie sleeps. Update: we are admitted and in the oncology unit at Children’s Hospital Los Angeles. We are surrounded by compassionate super hero healthcare workers who are already leaving their mark on our hearts. Ben and i still can’t be here with Stevie together (Covid precaution) and that’s a level of soul crushing i can’t even put into words—to not be able to comfort each other during the worst moments of both our lives, to not hold hands and cuddle our daughter together?. Stevie begs to be home with her pups and brothers and her own bed. She’s getting more lethargic by the hour, little appetite, not herself. Right now, all we do is wait and it’s unnerving. We don’t know any more conclusive information until her MRI—which is now scheduled for tomorrow (time TBD). Stevie is beyond brave and i see her working so hard to make the most of this and tolerate her discomfort. I snuck home for an hour today to squeeze my boys and be honest with them about what’s happening with Stevie. We cried together, prayed together and made promises to give grace and show up for each other in this time—i think they got it. Your outpouring of love, compassion, support and prayers is felt beyond measure. We can literally feel your hearts opening to us and that has helped us feel less alone in this scary season, thank you, from the bottom of our hearts. #stevielynnstock

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

 

Η μικρούλα μεταφέρθηκε στο νοσοκομείο όταν άρχισε να χάνει με ταχείς ρυθμούς τις κινητικές της δεξιότητες και διαγνώστηκε με όγκο στον εγκέφαλο.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

I always imagined i would coach her soccer team one day. Weekend tournament mother/daughter road trips, practicing in the backyard, feeling my stomach bottom out for her when she misses her first penalty kick, beaming with pride when she scores the game winning goal. I imagine I’d certainly lose my cool during intense games and I’d likely embarrass her from the sidelines. I’d tell her stories from my soccer days—stories about when i was a poor sport (more than i care to admit), about leadership, about getting red carded out of my final game senior year, about secret handshakes and team comradery and the best songs on my “warm up” mix CD (Dixie Chicks, blink 182 and Green Day). She’d roll her eyes and call me a Boomer but I’d hope that deep down she’d see some of herself in me and it would make her proud. Right now, Stevie is surrounded by the ones she loves most, with her favorite treats and unlimited snuggles and “surprises”. She’s not grieving a life she imagined and soccer games not played. I am. And, unlike many other parents on this icky cancer road, that’s an element to this horrible pain that Ben and I don’t have to face. She doesn’t know what’s happening, she doesn’t ask questions, she’s not grieving, she’s doesn’t feel like she’s “missing out” or counting down the hours and the minutes of her days. My heart aches for the parents who must grieve alongside their children who understand their prognosis, explaining a pain and a tragedy to their child when they are barely learning to process the grief themselves. That is a level of pain i can’t fathom—and amidst my own grief, i save space and get on my knees in prayer for these extra super hero parents balancing the physical AND emotional needs of their sick kiddos. Friends,the prayers work. I have PHYSICALLY felt your prayers wash over me like a wave in moments that i feel too weak to stand. It’s an energy that is tangible and real and powerful and keeping us going—and I’ll never be able to thank enough for the love you send our way every day. #stevielynnstock #starsforstevie #dipg ?: @michellebeller

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

 

Το κοριτσάκι άρχισε γρήγορα να γίνεται ληθαργικό, να χάνει την όρεξη του και αυτός ο μήνας ήταν ένας εφιάλτης για την οικογένεια της Stock. 

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

I don’t have words. Only an update. Last night our almost three year old daughter, Stevie was admitted to the hospital due to rapidly declining motor function. Ben is home with the boys because Covid restrictions only allow one parent with a child/patient at a time. After several tests, a social worker came and escorted me to a private room where 4 doctors sat waiting. My stomach sank as i accepted the box of tissues handed to me and they delivered the news that our sweet baby girl has a large mass on her brain. This is all we know for now. We are awaiting additional tests and a neurosurgeon and team of doctors will be having a round table to discuss best next steps for our baby girl. Please pray for our Stevie ❤️ #stevielynnstock

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

 

Η Ashley Stock ανέβαζε όλο αυτό το διάστημα στο instagram φωτογραφίες και βίντεο της μικρούλας, από το νοσοκομείο, αλλά και το σπίτι, προσπαθώντας να διαχειριστεί την θλίψη της.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

How do you put worst case scenario into words? That’s what I’m sitting here trying to figure out, in between holding my baby and hyperventilating with my head between my knees. Today we learned the news that Stevie’s tumor is a form of cancer called DIPG (diffuse intrinsic pontine glioma). And it has a 0% survival rate. We are shattered. Broken. Gutted. Somehow my body continues to produce tears and ugly crying has become my only release. We will be spending the rest of the week in the hospital to discuss treatments that will make the rest of her life more comfortable. Then we will be headed home where she can be comfortable with her brothers and puppies and we can cherish our sweet girl and heal as a family. I won’t pretend to understand why we have to go through this or what Gods purpose is in this pain, but my faith in Him is the only constant i have right now and I’m holding to it with every ounce of strength i posses. He knows our pain and He carries it with us. I know many of you love her dearly and this is ripping you in half too, and your instinct will be to fight and to push and to advocate and to try to save her—i know because those are our instincts too. But the reality of her prognosis is real. We have literally consulted and met with dozens of the top pediatric neurologists, neurosurgeons and oncologists. We would go to the ends of the earth to save her if we could. For all those who have been praying for a miracle with us, keep praying, but please know that Stevie’s miracle, our miracle may not come in the way you’re praying. But God is good and it WILL come and one day we will all understand the purpose in this pain. But for now we surrender. We surrender to her prognosis and that which we can’t control. We give her the best of everything she needs to be happy and pain free and we teach ourselves and our children how to make these final memories happy ones, ones we can hold onto and cherish, memories that make us smile even if we’re smiling through tears. #dipg

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

 

Λίγο μετά την εισαγωγή της μικρής Stevie στο νοσοκομείο, οι γονείς της ενημερώθηκαν πως πάσχει από μία μορφή καρκίνου που ονομάζεται διάχυτο εγγενές γλοίωμα γέφυρας (DIPG), με τους γιατρούς να τους ανακοινώνουν πως το παιδί δεν είχε καμία πιθανότητα επιβίωσης.

 

 

Αφού ενημερώθηκαν από τους γιατρούς για θεραπευτικές μεθόδους που θα έκαναν την υπόλοιπη ζωή του παιδιού τους όσο το δυνατόν πιο άνετη, η Ashley και ο σύζυγός της, Ben, πήραν την μικρή Stevie και επέστρεψαν στο σπίτι.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

The boys. I want to rescue them from this so bad. It’s been a fine line of shielding them from the scary parts but also being honest with them at every turn. We’re navigating uncharted territory and the weight of the impact this will have on their lives forevermore is heavy on my heart all day long. I’m certain I’ve said the wrong thing 100 times already. But they’re both so strong, and they tolerate my imperfections with such grace and even kiss me after i apologize. Our home nurse suggested we ask for their “help” to make them feel comfortable and validated. Sawyer is our natural helper and has taken to dishes and feeding all the pets. Wes (not so much of a natural helper ?) has been helpful by doing his best at giving me “less” of a hard time when we work on his school work together. And both boys are at Stevie’s beck and call all day. They adore her. Since she can’t walk anymore, the boys bring her snacks and toys and play peekaboo under the blankets with her every day. We haven’t had the hard conversations again since bringing Stevie home. Because right now we still see many glimpses of the sweet and sassy baby girl we know so well and we want our boys hearts to be filled with the happy for as long as possible. BUT, at the amazing advice a super hero mama who messaged one of my dear friends, i started a question box for any of the tough stuff they want to talk about or know about. I promise them complete honesty in my answers and give them the option to receive a written response or a personal conversation. So if they need answers now, they can get them. #stevielynnstock #starsforstevie

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

 

Η μικρούλα πέρασε τις τελευταίες εβδομάδες της ζωής της μαζί με τα δύο μεγαλύτερα αδέλφια της, τους γονείς και τα κουτάβια της, παίζοντας, γελώντας, ακούγοντας μουσική και κάνοντας πολλές αγκαλιές.

 

 

Η Stevie συνέχισε να γελά, να παίζει και να είναι ευτυχισμένη μέχρι το τέλος της ζωής της, πλάι στους πιο αγαπημένους της ανθρώπους...

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Favorite lyrics from a favorite song by @iam_alisanporter: “just be still. all that you remember will help the broken hearts to heal. and i will lift you up”. . This pain gets you into the club no one wants to be a part of. But this pain will also carry me into spaces i never had access to before. Spaces that are heavy. Spaces where grief comes in waves—suffocating and knee buckling waves. Spaces that are lonely. Spaces that need light. Spaces that need someone to come in and hold the other mamas who are curled in a ball on the floor and crying. Spaces where we can say “i see you. i feel you. i am where you are and you are not alone”. This road is lonely but we don’t walk it alone. #dipg

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

Η μαμά της προσπαθούσε να γελά μπροστά της και να κλαίει μόνο όταν το κοριτσάκι κοιμόταν.

 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

“This is my life now”. That sentence plays in my head several times daily. Sometimes i catch myself whispering it out loud. I still can’t tell if I’m phrasing it as a question or a mantra. Perhaps both. I suppose it depends on the moment. Because there are definitely times when I’m wading in peace about the new path the Lord has placed before us. But then, there are the mornings...when i wake up, and for a split second, i think this could all be a terrible nightmare and I’ll get out of bed and walk back into the life i signed up for. Then reality hits my like a punch to the gut. A lump forms in my throat and it becomes hard to swallow. Suddenly I’m torn between going back to sleep to stop the pain or rushing to scoop up my baby girl and soak up every single moment with her. I’m choosing the moments over the sleep. I can sleep later. I can breakdown later. For now, I trace the invisible line from the middle of her forehead down to the tip of her nose with my finger at least a hundred times a day. I’m memorizing the way her features relax with my touch. I’m saying silent prayers that i never forget the way her skin feels on mine. I’m smelling her salty hair and her sticky neck and her sweet little toes and wishing there was a way to bottle her scent up forever. I gently tickle her belly button and massage her head and tell her constantly that she is safe, she is loved, she is perfect, she makes me happy and I’m so proud of her. ?: @michellebeller

A post shared by Ashley Stock (@littlemissmomma) on

 

Μετά την τραγική απώλεια της κορούλας της, η Ashley τονίζει πως «δεν μπορεί να καταλάβει αυτή τη στιγμή με ποιον τρόπο θα μπορούσε να επιβιώσει» και πως δεν έχει ιδέα πως να το κάνει αυτό, ωστόσο στηρίζεται στην πίστη της στον Θεό και τους αγαπημένους της ανθρώπους, καθώς στις προσευχές των ξένων «που έγιναν φίλοι»...

 

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